We college students are notorious for believing that we know everything. I know that I rather argue first, and then think about what the other person was saying later. What we really need is a lesson in empathy. The following are some things that help me communicate far better than I would have without this little reminders to myself.

Listening is more important than speaking.
After all, wasn’t there that quote which said something like this: “Better to keep your mouth shut and have people think you’re a fool, than to open it and leave no doubt.” I tend to say the stupidest things when I open up my mouth anyway, so it’s better just to listen. Of course, you’ll come in a few days later and realize exactly what you should have said in the moment.

Let conversations flow naturally.
Let’s say you’re burning to input some funny story about last year’s summer vacation. Most people won’t care unless they’re involved in the story, or you’re one of those natural storytellers. But if you really must make say something about someone else’s utterly idiotic viewpoint or story, wait until it’s actually your turn to speak. And be nice about it, too.

Walk two moons in their moccasins.
My favorite book for a period was Walk Two Moons, which is why I use that particular quote. Of course, this can be just as easily translated to, “You can’t judge a person until you walk a mile in their shoes.” Which, of course, is true. But we judge people anyway. But before you go and chew someone out, you might want to consider what’s happened in their background to make them think a certain way.

Undoubtedly, listening is a skill that many students need to work on. I know I have problems with it. Do you have any other suggestions? Post them in the comments, please!

Posted on February 16th, 2007 by Joy
Filed under: Uncategorized